SOL March 13th The weight of stuff

I had other plans for today’s slice. In fact, it began as a morning slice with the intention to catch up on yesterday’s multilingual trend. Now it’s evening and I feel lucky to just get it done before I collapse into bed. It’s the weekend, right? Time off from work, traditionally. That’s not how the day has turned out.

I thought I had moved over 10 days ago which means now I should be settling in… Only the move is not yet complete. I left things behind and now they are being brought to my doorstep. One load at a time. This is the challenge of dividing a household. So when my partner brought over a load late this afternoon and opened the hatch to his Ford S-Max, I burst into tears.

More stuffed bags and boxes. Academic leftovers, artistic remains, clothing surplus, once-upon-a-time necessities. Boxes in boxes, bags holding more bags; familial and household accumulations that haunt rather than heal. Of course the old place must be emptied. And yes, at one time, even now, these things are/were mine or the boys’. Ownership can be a real drag. I keep dreaming of being done with moving. For now that remains a future state. A dream in (slow motion) progress.

To top it off, I was looking for something. I asked my partner to keep his eyes peeled for my immunization booklet and bring it along if located. I’m scheduled to get my vaccine tomorrow afternoon and finding that little yellow booklet was bold on my to-do list. Although he didn’t find it, he was careful to point out the boxes containing the items I thought it might be among. We moved on to other topics and tasks and I let that urgency go for a bit.

After he left I began to reason through my packing narrative, thinking of where I might have last seen that bright yellow document. Aha, that clear flat box over there, next to the Monopoly box, near the terrace door. Yes, papers, folders – for the car, some health stuff, allergy symptom calendars…bingo! The yellow immunization booklet is found! A medium sized victory to call it a day.

7 thoughts on “SOL March 13th The weight of stuff

  1. I can only imagine how difficult it is to split a household. I am glad you found what you were looking for. You post was another reminder to me that I need to purge mightily! My husband jokes that one day we will be on the front page of the paper under a headline reading, “Couple killed in bed when the attic caved in on top of them!” I would definitely call it a day too!

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  2. I felt your stress, the tear-bursting, the frantic looking for the immunization booklet. Silver lining that it was found. Some days are like this. Emotions overflow and also not at all as we planned. Moving is a lot. Give yourself grace. Xx

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  3. I ache for you mostly because separation from a past, even if it no longer serves you, is never easy. I am glad you found the immunization record and hope more peace in a new now will follow.

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  4. We’ve all had the experience of spending hours trying to find that one important document: in this case, the document was like a talisman – a record of the actions that have kept you safe and given you resistance to existential threats. Finding the booklet was a victory against chaos, a metaphor for how order and health and self-care are within reach. Great work Sherri!

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  5. The thing about moving – there are things I love about it: the inventory of our lives through our things, the fresh start, the ability to organize and re-organize. But then. That burden of ownership. Moving brings with it chaos and stress. But yes – you also get those medium-sized victories, and sometimes bigger ones if you’re lucky!

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  6. These lines lingered:
    “ I keep dreaming of being done with moving. For now that remains a future state. A dream in (slow motion) progress.” These words are what the world feels like now, slow motion dreams. Like so much about powerful writing, what is left off the page is the “weight”. But this one word, “dividing”, the mathematics of life, hit me most and brought forward my own experience; painful and beautiful at the same time.

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